Thursday, September 25, 2008

Wet your pants family fun!

If you have read some of my previous posts you will have noticed that I enjoy the pain and humiliation of others. I try to incorporate this enjoyment into the games we play when we gather for holidays.

The video scavenger hunt has been a perennial Thanksgiving favorite. It goes like this; you have all your gullible family members form teams, these teams do really dumb, embarrassing things all around our small town, and (this is the tricky part), you get them to video tape themselves doing it and then they bring their videos back and the entire family gets to view the videos. I know what you are thinking, "No family with an ounce of dignity or self respect would do this to themselves." I know! I know! But as luck would have it, my family has no pride, I'm so lucky that way! OK, my mom does have a little, but she's the only one.

We form teams of about 8 people, each team has to be able to pack themselves into a vehicle. With our large family we can usually form about 4 or 5 teams. Their are a few stick-in-the-mud types that don't play. We punish them by leaving the smallest children with them and they get stuck wiping noses and changing dirty diapers. They don't want to play, they must pay!

Each team is given the same list. They need to complete, with video proof, all the tasks listed and the team that completes the list quickest gets extra points. Let the hilarity ensue.

This is a partial list of the things I have convinced my family members to do over the years. Keep in mind the fact that we live in a small community where everyone knows everyone. It ramps up the humiliation factor.

  • Go to the post office. Form a line, hands over hearts, and say the pledge of allegiance to the flag.

  • One team member must go into the convenience store, get three squares of toilet paper from the bathroom, go to the front desk and ask the cashier, "How much for this?"

  • Go to the football field and one team member must kick a field goal. (A ball and stand are provided at the field.)

  • In relay fashion, while wearing the long blond wig, every team member must go down the 'big slide' at the elementary school. Handing off the wig like a baton. (The Barbie wigs were Halloween clearance items I found, every team got one.)

  • Go to the stop light(we only have one). One wig wearing team member must use the spray bottle and cloth provided to wash the windshields of passers-by until someone pays you for your work. Must be a non-family member that pays you.

  • One team member, wearing the wig, must run and touch all 4 traffic lights at the intersection of 14th and Main. (I can still see the young men sprinting across the streets with their long blond Barbie curls flying.)

  • Find a teacher that you liked and thank them for being a good teacher. Ask them for a word of wisdom. (The principal gave these words of wisdom to one of our teams, "Don't play leap-frog with a unicorn!")

  • Do the funniest thing you can think of that is legal and safe.

The last task is by far the best. One team mooned the camera. I believe they were disqualified because it's illegal - Indecent Exposure. Another team went to a man we know who has a long white beard, team members sat on his lap and told him what they wanted for Christmas (he was in his pajamas)! The best and most awe-inspiring was when a team went to the door of our towns scary, 'he may have bodies buried in the back yard but nobody really knows' guy. They brought him a piece of pumpkin pie and wished him a happy Thanksgiving! He was very appreciative and talked to them at the door while he ate the pie. Every small town has at least one of these people don't they?

We have witnessed sabotage, a team stole anther's wig and threw it up into a tree. Another team negligently left the keys in their vehicle while they raced to complete a task. My team took their keys. Hee, Hee. It was dang cold that night! Hee, Hee, Hee. "Hey, we could have taken the car too, you whiners!"

When we all get back we view the videos and wet our pants laughing. Other families in the area have started playing this game at their Thanksgiving parties. What have we started? The next generation of scary, crazy people for our small town? I guess every town has to have them!


Tater said...

I think you should post the videos.

Slug-A-Bed said...

Hey tater, I wouldn't dare, they'd kill me for sure!